Miles to go.

as I sit in anticipation, gazing
out the window of the backseat,
going seventy five without a radio
down the grains of the highway,
watching the amber waves sway
past, I am aware that with every
passing grain, every passing day
there is another memory that we
will never have, another day lost
to indecision and circumstance;
I watch the waves carry me into
hope swaying against reality, and
I am lost in a sea of grains, buying
the outcome of dreams not quite
attainable without a new horizon.

LV Letters – Two

In every shade of blue,
I see the reflection of the
stars whispering songs
of sonnets against your
eyelashes, in time to the
fallen beats of a trumpet
and her sax, mixing love
with jazz and the sight of
rain in the horizon; with
every variant and in every
direction, I am the brush
swirling together a lifetime
of words and promises,
waiting for you to notice.

Indecision.

without a cloud in the sky,
and with the succession of
leaves falling to a melody
that I couldn’t hear, I had no
place to hide my darkness;
standing in sunlight, drying
up from the absence of lost
promises, I was restless in
my preparations for a shift
in the seasons, believing in
change, and that soon I’d
have my own place to hide.

Thirty-Eight

with the echoing of jazz
past the crisp autumn air
falling into the rhythm of
leaves dancing sonnets
to the ground; with beats
of percussions and lonely
hearts holding on to stars
in the earliest hours of the
morning, waiting in sought
after transition of the sun –
still smiling albeit curious,
with the rise and eminent
fall of indecision, breaking
daylight with every peak of
hesitation and whispering
echoes of jazz, only to fall.

Reflections in Blue

Painted against the glass
in concrete memories of blue,
where a laugh and a whisper
could collide in a gentle sigh
drifting deeply into the night
behind the smile in your eyes;
where the traces of the moon
are light brushes of my fingers
against your ever warming skin,
I kissed your lips and whispered
that I still loved you – the first
time in months those words fell
from my lips, but always circling
my heart. With a look back at the
portrait painted in glass, two lovers
hand in hand, leaning into the other’s
sigh, with an escape of the moon,
circling us in love and in blue.

LV Letters – One

In between days of returning
to home, and wishful thinking
I kissed her cheek and felt her
sigh shiver down my spine as she
had her arms around me, only to
be absorbed by the concrete – or
perhaps it still hasn’t left me; a
slight shiver bouncing from my
memories and hopeful dreams.
She is always with me, a slight
burn of her fingertips as she
pulled away, leaving the best
kind of scars, only left to be
kissed away in the pending rain.

Toy, in attachment.

Caught between lifestyles
of silence or whispers gently
rocking me to sleep, I was
burdened with decisions that
I had no control over – I was a
puppet playing with my own
strings, tugging and pulling,
alone with my thoughts in a
constant contemplation if the
only decision I had left in my
pocket was to allow the strings
to break. I didn’t want to flee,
it wasn’t in my nature, but my
wrists were burning from the
weight, and I was in need of
some comfort – I just didn’t
know if I could still rely on
you to be the one to save me.

Curious.

I saw you everywhere I looked,
from the carvings of the base of
the trees to the butterflies floating
from wildflower to wildflower,
knowing that they had the exact
same spirit I came to love, in you.
I saw you in the sun coming in
through the tree line, bouncing
reflections off the boulders and
helping guide my path. You are
whispering in the breeze, calling
out hope, because that is the only
thing I have left to hold onto; and
I felt you in the breeze as I reached
the top of the summit, knowing you
were wrapping yourself around me.
I still see you in everything, I only
wonder where you still find me.

Thirty-Six.

Somewhere along the trail, I
left my heart in the mountains;
rooted deeply between a broken
boulder and a stream of yellow
wildflowers, growing in patches
of the rising sun between trees
sprouted in a soil of hope and
abundant harmony. I planted
my heart, in the simplest of
desires that you would be the
one to go back and find it, half
buried in the shadows on the
western side of the mountain
calling out to you. I am in love,
somewhere between breezes
and the boulders; all that’s left
is for you to come find me.

Going Home.

my feet had finally touched
the soil I had been longing
for, these past two years, and
yet – this didn’t quite feel like
home anymore. after all the
planning, reminiscing, and the
bribing past love and devotion,
this wasn’t the landscape of
my dreams anymore, for my
only true home, is with you.